Solo Living after 50:

Build a life for yourself but don’t forget to include people in your life

Create different circles of friends and be flexible about connections. You may be part of a book club, a photo walk group, a hiking group, and a supper club. Some people may be part of the same groups, and the chances are that you will have different people in other groups.

People bring unique inspirations that will enrich your life. You will learn so much from different cultures and backgrounds. It will require that you be flexible and fluid about moving in and out of groups- and of course, you will also have your favorite friends; the ones that you will confide in, ask for help and go out for coffee or tea.

When you live alone, it’s easier to move from group to group and try out different types of connections. It keeps your life exciting, and you will be renewing, renovating, and energizing your life.

The fun side of solo living

1 Eat breakfast in bed

I get out my tray, make my coffee, toast, and farmer’s cheese and bring it to my bed. I open the windows to see my little patio, turn on the radio and relax while I enjoy the TLC that I just gave myself. I love a slow morning. How do you like to start your mornings?

2 House organization

We all have different ways to put things away, and when you live with someone, you have to consider their organizational methods. A box under the bed may irritate some people, and using organizational baskets in a closet may not make sense to others. It’s a pleasure for me to live in a place where I understand why and where everything is.

3 Redecorate your house whenever you want

I love to change things around, add seasonal colors, and substitute furniture. I don’t look at a house as static; I believe it has to flow and go with your mood. Some people hate changes and like to live with everything in the same place forever, but I love the idea of tweaking things yearly.

4 Indulge in your guiltless pleasures

Don’t you love spending a day in your pj’s or your favorite ancient t-shirt and leggings?

My treat to myself. Roman coin pendant made by Antje Weber @antjeweberart

5 Treat yourself

Give yourself little weekly gifts—a unique basket of fruits, colorful wine glasses, a knick-knack from the flea market. Wrap it up and leave it on the table to be opened later in the day.

Living alone and the luxury of getting to know yourself

Solo living allows you to test things at your own pace. For example, you thought that your favorite part of the day was the evenings, and since living alone, you find the evenings challenging.

Try out things. Instead of binging on films, find hobbies (I’ll discuss this a little further down this post). When you live alone, you can change your mind and don’t need an excuse to stop doing something you have always done. It’s a luxury! If you don’t like staying home, go to night exercise classes, join a book club, etc.

More good things about the solo lifestyle:

• Design your budget for your needs and pleasure, learn to make time, and spend money on the things you love. Save for goodies!

• Make a mess and leave it there for a few hours or a day and see if you can live like that or not! It may spark ideas on how to organize your house.

• Revisit your lifestyle constantly by creating “me time” to think about what you like and don’t like and what you want to change.

• Get out of your comfort zone. You will know more about yourself when you do a few things out of your comfort zone.

• Invest in self-development.

• Journal daily or weekly.

The challenges of living alone and how to cope

Let’s face it, being alone all the time is not fun! But in all fairness, it can be a challenge even if you are part of a family or a couple.

Does your house feel empty?

Place several flower vases throughout the house.

Light candles or use indirect light to create a cozy ambient.

Turn on the music and keep it low so that it’s nice background noise.

Memorable solo dinners

Feeling low and don’t know what to do at home?

Pamper yourself! Create a memorable dinner for yourself several times a week. Try out a different recipe and place the table for a queen.

Are you bored? Create challenges.

• Take a class on something new, something you have never done before, and that you have always wanted to learn or perfect.

• Change your exercise routine.

• Schedule your hobby so that there is no excuse not to do it!

• Develop new hobbies.

• Create mini-adventures (road trips, train trips to nowhere, photo walks, etc.)

Change your point of view

• Look at the fact that you live alone from a positive point of view, from a place of strength; it’s a chance to re-start your life and create your fabulous world.

Be proactive and aware of your feelings

• Be attentive to your mood and create ways to shift them. Make a list of things that will help you when you are feeling low.

  Here are some of my proactive examples:

  1. When I am moody or feel stuck, I know I need to move to shift my mood, so I go for a walk or hop on my stationary bike the minute I feel the blues.

  2. I avoid feeling isolated by scheduling a few dinners a month, scheduling museum and gallery visits, making a day trip, calling friends, and I go to a busy cafe at least once a week.

  3. I am always busy with a project. I listen to at least one book a week.

  4. I am part of two writing groups.

  5. Once a month, I try out a new recipe, and I try out a new restaurant at least once a month.

  6. Have a list of “Anti-Boredom Activities.” When I want to re-vamp my style and de-clutter my closet, I play the stylist. I try on clothes and combine them differently and note how best to wear certain things. If I see something that doesn’t fit well or hasn’t been worn lately, I give it away. I have loads of fun playing with my clothes and “closet shopping.”

  7. My photo hobby and my painting hobby keep me constantly learning and trying out new things.

  The best of solo living

  As you see, solo living has its benefits, and it can be as fun as you choose to make it.