Mental health issues: Getting help and how to help

I was surprised, bewildered and wondered what to say to her. I wanted to help this lady but was so afraid of talking about mental health issues or saying something wrong.

!I told her that I didn’t understand what she had said and so she repeated that she had depression.

How do you help someone with mental health issues?

I came closer to her while I smiled at her and asked her if she had seen her doctor for her mental health issues.  She said that she had and that the doctor gave her medication.

“Good” I answered. “When did you go to the doctor?”  I asked. 

I did not know what to say and I thought I should just keep talking. She looked like she need to do speak to someone. 

She told me she had just gone and that the doctor told her she had to walk every day. 

Her doctor told her that she had to get out of the house.

She told me she did not want to walk and I said that sometimes when we are not well we want to stay at home and hibernate. 

It’s scary to help people but it feels so good!

I asked her if she had someone at home that could accompany her on her walks and she said that she did have someone. 

I looked at her and wondered how old she was.  She was a pretty woman and  looked like she was in her seventy’s. 

The lady told me that she had a companion at home but that he wasn’t well mentally and she made that swirly, circling sign around her ears as if to say that he was crazy. I did not react and kept talking. At least I hope I did not react!

I told her that if she could walk just a little bit a day and then make the walks longer. She repeated that she didn’t want to leave her house.

“Five minutes in the morning and five minutes in the evening, that’s all” I answered.

“No”

“I exercise. I am about to go to the pool and I walk on other days” I said.

“I can’t go out like this”I told her that I knew it was really hot right now and very hard to be out and about but if she went out early in the morning and then  late at night it would be a great help.

I stopped talking because I didn’t want to make her uncomfortable.

We began to walk up the hill together and she turned right and I headed off to my car thinking about this lady.

I looked back to see where she was going and maybe I could see her walking in a house. I thought I could check up on her later. Or something like that but she did not go in any of the houses there.

Swimming is how I deal with my mental health issues and any problem

I went in the pool and I could not stop thinking about her as I did my laps. 

Will she be alright? What else should I have done. 

I kept on swimming and did more laps than usual. By the end of my laps I was feeling calm.

Will I see her again?  I wish I could tell her how swimming is so good for mental health issues, well-my mental health!  When I swim I stop ruminating.  It’s a very meditative exercise.

I just heard a BBC interview with Mr. Kofi Annan who said that he went on long walks to clear his mind.

We all need to find our special ways to clear our minds! I know people that clear their minds when they create something, others like to dance and there are so many ways to help you clear your mind. 

I decided that I would keep an eye out for this lady when I walk around and hope to see her again. 

I cannot help her with her mental health  because I don’t have the training but I could be supportive somehow.  I don’t know if her depression was due to a health problem or an event and I did not feel comfortable asking her.I felt that this lady was abandoned by her doctor- but I could be so wrong.  I couldn’t help but think about her age and that she needed more support but she knew how to communicate and I just hope that she will communicate with the people that can help her.

Small towns are great because everyone knows each other

I was finishing my illustration about the cafe across the street when I heard the  ladies’ chatter downstairs at the Cafe Primavera.. It was that time of the day- when they all meet up, have a few drinks and head home to watch their favourite soap operas!

I went to the cafe and told them about my morning meeting with the lady who told me about being depressed.. They all knew her and told me not to worry.

Yes, she was going through a tough time but they did not know why.

She has had mental health issues for some time now and she tells everyone about it. 

She is also walking every day and complains about having to walk.

I published this article on Facebook and other places and I received many emails with tips about getting help for mental health and  how I can help people with mental health.

I was congratulated for not giving out advice- In other words: Keeping my mouth shut but gently guiding her towards exercises. 

People wanted to know more about where I lived because they loved the idea that neighbours actually knew each other and cared for each other.

This happened in the city of Elvas in Portugal, where I lived for two years.

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Update June 2025